{{{filler}}}

I'm not sure why, but I really like the way those {{{ things look. Kinda like echo echo echo. So THAT'S what the inside of my head really looks like! I have nothing to report. Was a fairly so-so return to work today. Some of my customer's were insane. More than once today I cheerily requested to put them on hold and then once they were on hold I continued in monotone with "so I can beat my head into my desk until I am dead." Keyboard kept getting in the way and beeping so there went that plot out the window. Wound up having to answer their darned questions anyway. Still, it really baffles my mind the things these people think of to call and ask about. That they will then complain about because it inevitably will cause their rates to go up.

Customer: Well, what if I got really drunk and ran over a small dog -- what part of my policy gives me coverage for that?
Me: Sir, DID you hit a dog?
Customer: It depends on your answer.
Me: No, sir -- it doesn't. Either you hit the dog or you didn't.
Customer: Honestly I think it was already dead when I hit it. Besides, it was my son driving anyways and he was only SORTA drunk.
Me: Uh-huh. But we don't even show your son is driving.
C: You don't? Well, he's been driving for about 6 months now.
Me: {{{tap, tap, key, key}}} Well, that's going to be about $1 billion extra per month for that alcoholic teenager who got in the accident.
C: You frigging bastards just want all of my money -- why do I pay insurance anyways?
Me: Because you have to and you love us and you're going to keep paying and you're going to like it or I will send the Hounds of Hell on you

Just kidding. I mean, I basically say that last part, but in very syrupy customer service girl voice, so it's okay.

I want to be an underwriter. They get paid, very well I might add, to tell people that they suck and we're going to charge them a WHOOOOLE lot because they suck and if they don't like it they can just TRY to get insurance somewhere else but they're never going to be able to because no other company is going to put up with their foul suckiness. THAT would be cool. And they get to say that stuff, I saw it in the job description.

But seriously, I do feel a twinge of some (blonde) ambition and I'm going to be plotting that climb up the old corporate ladder so's I can get back to some of the evil that's so innate in my personality.

And that's all I've got for today -- not bad for someone who didn't have ANYTHING. Tomorrow: Tales from the Teeth!
Godspeed!
HP