Sunday, June 01, 2003

Back off Cynics -- this one's for the rose-colored glass kids...


I won't deny it. I am in love with being in love and lot of that is where the conflict comes in... The day to day stuff doesn't always equal "being in love", sometimes its lovebuzz kill. But when I'm feeling that in love feeling, I just can't deny its power.

That was one of my favorite episodes of Sex and the City, where Carrie is talking about the za za zu. That's how the marriages that work WORK, because there is always that zing-POW feeling in the background, of when you first met and you were first dating and just holding hands made you all tingly happy. When things are rough and you're at your wits end and you can't remember WHAT brought to this place, with this person its because underneath all of those feelings you have the memory of the za za zu. That's how it is with S. We'll be going along and things that he does will drive me UP the friggin wall. Up and down again. I'll start to grind my teeth just at the thought of him, but then... He'll spend the day with me and do something particularly goofy just to get me to grin, and he'll make some particularly crass comment but with such tenderness that I would feel guilty for calling him on his crassness. Or just look at me, that WAY that he gets and I'm just a pool of melted adoration. It's sickening, even to me. I can't help it, the boy just makes me HAPPY!

All right, that's enough of the love happy -- I need to go spend some time with my brush. But if you're out there buddy, I love ya!

Isn't it nice to finally read that? ;-)
HP

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