Wednesday, August 20, 2003

Or comfortable like granny underwear

It's official. I'm out of blog material. Again. At least, anything interesting. And this after I went on a road trip with Daddy this weekend.

Not to say that wasn't interesting. We went to Potomac Mills and shopped til we would have dropped if we didn't have to drive home right after. He hit Ikea hard (no, he's not gay) and I hit the Old Navy Outlet hard. Some of my friends expressed jealousy that MY boyfriend likes to shop (more than I do, in fact) until I pointed out that THEIR boyfriends aren't obsessed with football -- so it evened out.

And the driving was an interesting experience. I tried not to pay attention. You see, Daddy hasn't figured out that the rules of the road really do NOT apply in certain areas of the world. So, if he is driving in the left lane and is obviously wanting to go faster than the person in front of him, he cannot understand why the other person won't get move to the right lane to let him pass. I tried to explain, repeatedly, that it's a lot easier to just pass them on the right and go against the "laws of man" but he just didn't want to readily accept that. Even when he adopted this principle, he was still pissed off that he was passing people in the "slow lane" in a Kia! I gave up.

The thing is that our relationship has fallen into such a comfortable, easy groove that there's nothing to complain about. (I'm SURE he'd beg to differ with me on whether or not I complain.) It's a strange feeling for me, actually being COMPLETELY relaxed with another person. Even in some of my friendships there isn't this level of comfort. I've just been really slipping into this feeling lately -- like diving into a vat of warm, rising bread dough. Or a nice big hot bath. (Minus the addition of other people's skin peelings... Don't ask.) Like really good chemical enhancement, only all the time. I'm open with people because I'm an extreme extrovert, but it's still not very often that I completely trust anyone -- least of all men. But, with Daddy -- he just proves time and again that he can be trusted and WANTS to be trusted.

That's a big thing. Lots of people CAN be trusted, really -- but they don't want you to put your faith in them. That takes a lot. When you really let someone put their trust in you, you're saying that you're going to be there NO MATTER WHAT. You will listen, you will act, you will do whatever you need to do because the other person TRUSTS that you will do these things. And that takes a level of commitment that most people (not just men -- PEOPLE) are not willing to get to. Because to be strong for someone else, you also have to accept your own weaknesses. (Ick -- didn't that sound like cliche'd crap? But it's true!) You have to realize that it's hard to have someone depend on you, even just to listen to them ramble about their day.

Sidetracked. So, yeah -- relationship is in really comfortable phase. And not even in a boring, Dr. Scholls shoes kinda way.

Which has been the case for a long time and I've still managed to drudge up material. It goes back to obligatory blogging. I'm over it. I hereby declare a moratorium on my need to satisfy my imaginary audience's unsated need for me daily. I will write when I can and when I want!

Watch -- tomorrow 1000 things will happen that I will want to write about just because I said I don't "have" to. Ain't life funny?

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