Bridezilla need Wedding dress.... grrr

Did my first foray into the wedding thing yesterday. Scary. SCARY. As soon as one walks into the bridal shop, one is set upon by bridal consultants in a fashion similar to vultures and fresh meat. They were asking me all of these questions and having me fill out forms and so on. Apparently, you're not allowed to even try on dresses unless you are registered with the store. And thus the registration process begins.

And it's all this cooing over the ring and cooing over your proposed selections and ideas of how you should look and what your hair should be like. And you're called baby and honey and sweetie over and over and OVER again. I just wanted to stamp my feet and say in a pouty, princess-like way, "I'm not a baby, I'm getting married, damnit."

But, I couldn't do that because I was so exhausted from being dressed by other people for 3 1/2 hours. One big huge puffy sparkly dress after the next. My, oh my.

I alternated between looking like a cake topper and the front end of a ship. And the walking? That was even funnier. It's kick the dress away, step, kick the dress away, step. I gave up the idea of seeing my feet after the 3rd dress. And then, gave up feeling them by the 4th because the shoes they had me in were NOT comfortable. I think all told I tried on at least 7 dresses, but probably more. It was exhausting. And NOT fun. Who ever said that stuff was fun?? I was so strapped and bound that nothing was moving anywhere and I couldn't breathe or bend and even though I look gorgeous, I just couldn't even appreciate it.

And the bridal consultants don't really leave much room for free thought. Which is kind of a good thing, because I wound up trying on some styles that I never would have thought looked good on me and having them turn out to be better than what I even had in mind. And very flattering to my curvy girl figure. Which wedding dresses are kind of designed for, in many ways. The corset style tops that give you the vavavoom cleavage and the full skirts that hide all of your imperfections. It's nice.

But, by the end of it my eyes were glazed over and I was more confused than I was before I even walked in. Visions of pearls and sequins and satin and taffeta dancing in my head. I was ready for a break. Visions of getting married in a bathing suit in Bermuda and all of the freedom of movement started dancing in my head.

Only time will tell what the future brings and for now, I just want to survive The Holidays!