plagued by a poor vocabulary

And here's why I'm plagued -- because I lack the sufficient range of critical phrases to really, properly pan Coupling. What an awful, awful show.

And trust me, I'm just a heartbeat above being one of the most easily amused white women in America. It doesn't take much. Well, that's how it feels. Do you find yourself in these positions where you are not only the only person laughing at a joke or movie or comedian or whatever -- but you are laughing really, REALLY loud to boot? Yeah. That's me. Happens ALL the time. It's hard. I have adapted. There are just some things I find funny that other people don't. (Classic example -- Pootie Tang... I once told someone that I laughed so hard at that movie that I almost peed and that person never spoke to me again.) And when I find things funny, well -- everyone knows. I don't have a quiety, ladylike laugh on the best of occasions.

But I digress. Coupling, it sucks. A lot. Everyone looks like they're trying so hard. "Oh, look at us -- we're talking about sex and it's all in good fun." "Look, we're all having sex with each other -- aren't we cool?" Ick. What if everyone on Friends had slept with each other by the middle of the second episode? What's there to look forward to, exactly? What's left? You're going to bring in new people I care about even less than these characters and sleep with them too? Snore. They're all caricatures of themselves and it's too early for that. I can't stand overblown characters that just have 3 personality traits. I mean, seriously -- I'm boring as shit and even I have a couple more traits than that. Not the least of which is that I make some people think they're really funny. (They probably aren't, but they are to me.)

But, still -- I am upset that I lack the range of phrases that critics seem to have at that their disposal to fully describe how awful something is. Do you suppose they have a flip chart for that?? Kinda like those books that you used to have when you were a kid where you combined the different heads with the different bodies and feet? Only you combine different aspects of movies and get these phrases.

"Okay, it has a monkey, Sigourney Weaver and mismatched identities -- what's the proper phrase?"

On a WILDLY skew tangent, Scout made me work out last night. Now, I'm in pain. A lot of it. It's been difficult to move my arms without yelping. I managed somehow.

I'm telling you this to explain why I'm ending this... Here!

-HP