FAQ about out-patient brain surgery

Q: Isn't it amazing that we have come so far that your brain can be operated on and you can go home the same day, only glowing slightly?

A: Yes, it is. I would say that these are amazing times indeed, but the gamma knife procedure has been around for a little while. Luckily, they have been working on it and seem to have no further need for the hamster.

Q: Don't you ever get tired of making light of this, Heather?
A: Have we actually met?

Q: Funny. But, seriously how are you? (Or some variation therein -- like, how are you feeeeeling?)
A: Well, I'll tell you in all seriousness that I feel great. I'm really excited that I have the opportunity to have this procedure and quite possibly avoid all of the horrible things my mother had to endure. The chance of maintaining my hearing, preserving my balance, not having any facial paralysis, well... I can't help but feel upbeat about my prospects.

As an aside... When I first found out about this, I really felt like I was getting something close to a death sentence. I was led to believe that I should wait to see if my neuromas developed/grew and then if they did, that invasive surgery was the only logical pursuit. But, gamma knife has the possibility to prevent the neuromas from growing more and preventing the need for invasive surgery. I feel that if I have a chance to avoid a life in the quiet, then I'm going to grab it. If I have a chance to avoid going through an MRI every six months, I'm going to take that.

I was inspired by women, who upon learning that they have malignancies in their own breasts after going through the deaths of their mothers make the radical decision to pursue double mastectomy sooner than medically advised. Because you know what? It is my body and I am going to do what I need to do to preserve it even if it's considered radical.

Q: Are you in pain? Do you have headaches?
A: I have to tell you that this question really drives me bonkers. Here's why -- when I tell people what is wrong with me, I go into explicit detail about what it is, where it is and how it works. I am very emphatic that this is not the type of tumor that can kill me and that I never would have even known that it was there if I were not doing regular hearing screening. I may make jokes about the fact that I have a tumor and so on, but in the beginning, when the news is broken it is in very detailed information. So, anyone that asks me that was not paying attention. It is frustrating. I know they mean well and I'm just being bitchy and self-centered to get irritated, but whatever. If you really mean well, then pay attention.

I can't think of any other FAQ's. Those are the main ones.

So, tomorrow is Hulk Day! Grrrr... By the time you are reading this, it will probably be over since we have to be there at 6:00 am. I am going to try to get Scott to take some pictures (ever the maudlin drama queen) because I think the halo thing is going to be something to see.

love you mean it!

hpl